What Becomes of Us After the Breaking

There’s a version of life most of us imagine.
The one where the plan works, the relationships hold, and we grow into exactly who we thought we’d be.

But what happens when that version shatters?

What do we do when the marriage ends, the job disappears, the people we counted on are no longer there?

In this week’s episode of Running Ahrens, we sat down with our dear friend Kelly Allison, a brilliant creative, solo parent, and survivor of so many life-altering moments. Her story is layered, honest, and full of wisdom that’s stayed with us.

This post isn’t a recap of that conversation, it’s a reflection of what we learned from it. Because so much of what Kelly shared mirrors the quiet, messy, powerful work of becoming we’re all invited into.

Here are some truths we’re walking away with:

1. Boundaries are a form of love.
Not everyone will understand the lines you draw.
But protecting your peace, especially when you’ve fought to find it, isn’t selfish. It’s sacred.

2. Grief doesn’t mean you’re broken.
You can love someone deeply and still feel pain, confusion, even anger in their absence.
Grief and gratitude can live in the same space. So can heartbreak and healing.

3. Rebuilding your life might look nothing like what came before.
And that’s okay.
Sometimes rebuilding means reinventing.
Sometimes it means doing the thing you were afraid to name.
Sometimes it means admitting: “I need something different now.”

4. Chosen family is real family.
The people who show up, affirm your identity, and fight for your belonging, those are your people. You don’t owe anyone access to your story if they refuse to see who you truly are.

5. Creativity is more than expression, it’s survival.
We were made to make. And sometimes, making is the only way we find our way back to ourselves.

If you’re in the thick of becoming…

We see you.

Maybe you’re setting new boundaries for the first time.
Maybe you're holding grief that no one else can see.
Maybe you’ve walked away from something, or someone, you once built your life around. Maybe you’re finally stepping into your own story.

Whatever season you're in, here’s what we believe:

You are not too much.
You are not too late.
And your story is not over.

You are becoming. And that’s enough.

This is what we took away from Kelly’s story.
And maybe, some part of it is for you too.

With grace,
Justin & Sarah